


Objects In The Rearview Mirror

by Lasafara



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Meatloaf, Songfic, sort of canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 00:42:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18377435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lasafara/pseuds/Lasafara
Summary: Dean and Sam reflect on their past, to the tune of Meatloaf's Objects In The Rearview Mirror. Set during Cas's death and time with the Empty.





	Objects In The Rearview Mirror

_The skies were pure and the fields were green--_

The song didn't come on his playlist often, but Dean grinned as Meatloaf began to sing. He enjoyed the musician's ballads immensely. They were truly epic, spanning six minutes easily, and generally were love songs, if not in reality then to the genre itself. It was hard not to love Meatloaf, really.

As the song played, though, he became a bit melancholy. Benny. That's who this first verse reminded him of. Benny had been the first real friend that Dean had had that hadn't needed something from him. At least, nothing that wasn't just to be his friend. Dean still felt like he had failed Benny. Purgatory had been pure, true, but more importantly Benny had been there for him. There were times even now when he wanted to call Benny and tell him something.

*****

_We were ready for adventures and we wanted them all--_

Sam paused outside Dean's door, and just listened for a long moment. He hadn't heard the song in a long time, but he couldn't help but think about Dean. There was something about the song, even though the verse talked about the death of a friend, that reminded him of Dean. Dean was different, somewhat, when Sam came back from Stanford. It had been hard to leave his brother, and he remembered distinctly wishing he could call him up. It had been even worse when he had been taken to hell.

Dean had been everything to Sam, and he'd fully expected to have hunts with him as he got older. Even when he went off to college, he'd known he could always just call Dean and his brother would come running. But when he went to hell… Sam shook his head. His brother had come back changed, darker, and had not really gained back that light-heartedness he'd had as a kid. Sam wondered if it was possible to miss a piece of someone, to mourn them even though they were still around.

Then he shook his head, and knocked on the door.

*****

_I heard my father cursing everyone he knows--_

Dean and Sam sat at the table, listening to the radio as they ate, when Meatloaf came on.

"Damn, they never play Meatloaf on the radio," Dean said.

Sam hummed, both of them continuing to eat, until Sam looked up thoughtfully. "Dean… Did you really get injured on hunts a lot as a kid?"

Dean shrugged. "What can I say? I was a clumsy kid."

"I don't think that's true," Sam said. "You've never been clumsy. Dad was… Did he hurt you?"

With a sigh, Dean just shrugged again. "Don’t wanna talk about it."

_But it was long ago and it was far away--_

"Dean…" Sam said.

"I said I don't wanna talk about it, Sammy," Dean replied, shoving himself to his feet and putting his dishes away. "Dad did a lot of things that weren't great, but I made it through it, okay? You ran away, but I went through hell. And I did it alone, so that you could be free. So you know. There. I don't wanna talk about it anymore."

With that, Dean stormed off, leaving Sam to sigh and finish dinner.

_Objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are--_

*****

Sam finished his dinner, and then headed into the bedroom. Eileen was there, waiting for him, as he sat down on their bed.

_There was a beauty living on the edge of town--_

And he couldn't help but think of another woman he had loved, so very long ago. Jess had been his salvation, or so Sam had thought. She had represented a normal life for him, a way to be free from the expectations of hunting. Her death had been more than just the death of his normal life, though. She had been his first true love, and had been amazing.

"What are you thinking about?" Eileen signed.

"Just… The past," Sam replied. "Sometimes it seems like just yesterday I was in college with Jess."

"You miss her a lot."

"I do. I wouldn't trade you for the world, but I still wish--" Sam sighed, cutting himself off.

*****

_Just like an angel rising up from a tomb--_

Dean covered his face. Cas had been gone for days now, and Dean had accepted that he wasn't coming back. He'd wrapped Cas's body himself, tucked a wildflower in among the layers. It wasn't a rose, wasn't romantic, and yet Dean wished it had been. He wished… He wished they'd had more time, that he'd been braver. That he and Cas had been more to each other than they had been.

The phone rang…

*****

"Sam, get your things. We're heading out," Dean said, already on the way to the car. Sam didn't question.

_And if life is just a highway, then the soul is just a car--_

When they got to the small payphone near the church, Dean got out, staring at Cas.

"Hello, Dean."

Sam leaned over the hood. "Dean. Don't hold back on my account."

_Objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are--_

Dean jerked forward, grabbing Cas's face in his hands. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too," Cas said, looking up at Dean.

Dean leaned forward, and with the all the gentleness he'd wished he'd had before, he touched his lips to Cas's. With a sigh as gentle as a breeze, Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and leaned into it.

_But I can see her rising up out of the back seat now--_


End file.
